You Can't Have It Both Ways -- A David'Z RantZ Grammar Nazi Post from 5/23/08

BREAKING NEWS: Janie Junebug of WOMEN: WE SHALL OVERCOME has invited me to do a guest post on her blog. Right now she's showcasing a series of guest writers blogging on the subject of bullying, and this was a serious subject for me to tackle. Check it out at this link, and feel free to comment!

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Now here's yet another over-the-top diatribe from years gone by...

I understand and accept that the English language is a "living" language and, as such, is constantly being reinvented by those who use (or misuse) it on a day-to-day basis. So someday in the very near future, I expect grammarians to throw up their hands in collective surrender and say, "Fine! You want to make a word plural by adding an apostrophe 'S' instead of just an 'S?' Go ahead! That's the way you freakin' idiots have been doing it for the past few years anyway!"

But if you're going to change things, at least try to be consistent, willya?

Throughout most of my life, I've seen people write "mike" when they want to abbreviate "microphone." And in terms of what we laughingly call the "rules" by which the English language is governed, that spelling makes perfect sense. It rhymes with "like," "hike," "bike," etc. However, more and more, people are abbreviating "microphone" as "mic." That's wrong. Sorry, but I don't care if you're one of the increasing zillions who write it that way, but you're wrong. "Mic" should be pronounced "mick," as in "Mick Jagger." It should not rhyme with "mike."

Stop arguing with me! You're wrong! Shut up. Shut up! (Will somebody shut off his mic? I mean, his mike?)

I've mentioned this annoying trend to at least one person who seemed to think it was merely the new way of doing things, and that it would soon be a universal practice, and that I should just get over it.

Okay, then riddle me this, Batman:

Another trend I've seen developing over the last few years, especially where internet usage is concerned, is the tendency for people to use the term "pic" (short for "picture") in lieu of "photo" or "photograph." I'm not sure why "photo" is suddenly finding such disfavor. Maybe with the advent of digital cameras, people don't think the term "photo" should be used unless film is specifically involved, kinda like the "CD" versus "album" argument I discussed recently?

But I guess it doesn't matter, since "pic," of course, is pronounced "pike," so it rhymes with "like," "hike," "bike," and...

Oh, it isn't? Really? It rhymes with... well, like "mic" ought to be pronounced?

Well, whattya know about that!

Like I said, folks. All I ask for is a little consistency. But I'm not holding my breath.

Thanks for your time.